When organizations grow fast, even high-performing teams can suddenly find themselves talking past each other. Communication styles collide. Leaders from formerly separate companies often discover that they approach daily work quite differently. For example, one might opt for loud open debates, and the other for quieter, written communication.
So, where do you begin when talented people with good intentions are simply missing each other? And how do you course correct before miscommunication becomes conflict or even hostility? According to Marina Davis, Vice President of Organization Effectiveness at CBIZ, it all begins with emotional intelligence (EQ). “The vast majority of challenges during times of change aren’t about process. They’re about people trying to figure out how to work together,” she told me. And the research backs her up. Emotional intelligence can act as a powerful lever to stay nimble in times of change.
And in a company that grew from 7,000 employees to over 10,000 in a recent major acquisition, work like Davis’s has never been more critical.
The Self-ACE Model: A Practical Framework for Leaders
While Davis works broadly across culture, leadership, and organizational change, she’s developed one practical model that consistently drives transformation across all of these areas: Self-ACE.
The model stands for:
A — Self-Awareness. Understanding your emotional triggers, noticing how your behavior affects others, and acknowledging your blind spots.
C — Self-Control. Managing reactions in real time. Pausing before responding. Choosing curiosity over defensiveness.
E — Self-Evaluation. Reflecting honestly: What part did I play? What needs to change? What advice would I give to myself?
Davis intentionally avoids labeling the Self-ACE model as “emotional intelligence.” “The EQ model is intuitive up to a point,” she said. “But the research is deep. The Self-ACE model helps make EQ accessible, practical, specific, and repeatable.”
Self-ACE acts as the backbone of her coaching, her conflict resolution work, and her leadership development programs. It’s especially powerful in times of merger-driven culture blending, where teams are grappling with new expectations, new communication norms, and new leaders.
7 Emotional Intelligence Strategies Davis Applies In Her Work
Davis has been an advocate of emotional intelligence since Salovey and Mayer’s landmark paper on emotional intelligence came out in 1990. Throughout that time, she’s been training and coaching emotional intelligence. She shared a list of the seven EQ strategies she teaches most often:
- “Use yourself as a laboratory.” Notice your reactions. Study them. Adjust. Approach your surroundings with curiosity.
- “Human first, leader second.” “Often leaders first focus on thinking ‘What would a leader do?’ versus being a human first,” Davis explained. “I have seen leaders become emotional and then share as leaders they do not usually do that. I discuss with them that they always have to remember that no matter what they are human beings first. Once they embrace that mentality it frees them to be more authentic with those they work with and lead.”
- Lead with warmth before competence. Don’t lead with credentials. “I first have to feel like I can like you and trust you,” she explained. Based on Amy Cuddy’s research, Davis leans on the idea that you need to lead with warmth to build trust. Then, you can bring in your expertise to a more receptive audience.
- Take baby steps. Often, a change in behavior just requires one simple, short nudge. By breaking behaviors down into smaller parts, you can instigate real change. As an example, Davis shared how you can turn around the atmosphere of a virtual meeting by simply asking everyone to turn on their cameras. “Though these actions are small, they often require great courage,” she said.
- Look at people as if their stories are untold. This mindset helps you unlock curiosity, a critical mindset for growing your empathy and social awareness.
- Be kind to yourself, but not too kind. “Don’t be too hard on yourself,” Davis shared, “but do hold the mirror up honestly.” That balance can be difficult, but it’s the foundation of self-awareness and self-management.
- You will never be ‘awesome’ at EQ. “The moment you think you are is the moment you need to work on self-awareness,” Davis said.
Inside a Fractured Team: How to Use EQ Skills to Resolve Intense Team Conflict
At one point in her career, Davis intervened with a 15–20 person leadership team whose performance had sharply declined. Productivity was suffering. Retention was at risk. The team dynamics had grown hostile.
Two leaders who were formerly close had begun communicating solely through cold, formal emails—CC’ing the entire department every time. Their teams followed suit, avoiding one another. New hires walked into an environment filled with tension and unknown subtext.
After confidential interviews, environmental scans, and dozens of hours spent on distribution lists and chats to sense the cultural undercurrents, she brought the group together. “One of the leaders came out and apologized,” Davis recalled. “It took incredible professional courage.”
The apology cracked something open. People began sharing how they had contributed—intentionally or accidentally—to the dysfunction. Laughter returned. Tension eased. Someone teared up. One leader admitted they deeply missed their former colleague. Another said they hadn’t realized how much their behavior had impacted others.
Davis guided them through real emotional intelligence work. She asked questions like:
- Why did you react that way?
- What advice would you give to someone else in this situation?
- What story were you telling yourself?
As the group reflected, empathy resurfaced. And from that conversation, a simple action plan emerged—basic steps the team could commit to immediately. “EQ often is basic,” Davis said. “But sometimes teams need an objective insider to say, ‘How did we let this happen?’”
Team communication improved immediately. And measurable outcomes followed:
- Increase in opportunities (work pipeline and billables)
- Fewer HR grievances
- Improved employee and client retention
EQ Is the Subtle Force Behind Transformation
Emotional intelligence is built in moments: the pause before reacting, the question asked with curiosity, the willingness to see someone differently. When teams practice those small steps consistently, trust returns and performance follows. In Davis’s words, “EQ is the subtle between the obvious,” and it starts with one intentional choice at a time.
